Our local library was hosting a free show that I knew Logan would like. I also knew I would NOT like it. Serengeti Steve was bringing his reptiles for A Reptile Man show. Sounds awesome, right? Wrong. Not when you have a severe snake phobia.
My snake phobia is ridiculous. My heart races every time Logan plays in our yard and you can bet you won't find me wandering around our yard in the spring, summer, or fall! My dad once asked me if I could stand in a room with a snake. I told him "No Way!"
The show started off pleasant enough. Logan, Jeff, and I were sitting in the front row of seats (several feet away from the foreboding boxes in the front of the room with about 40 children on carpet squares in front of us). I felt relatively safe and my heart was only beating a little fast. Steve started off by sharing a story about his time on "America's Got Talent" He apparently got cut from the show because his act was too dangerous for the Danger category. Ha!
Steve starts talking about rats and I'm thinking that I'll be ok. Rats don't bother me. The box opens up and this is the "rat" he pulls out!
| A rat snake does not equal rat in my world |
My heart is starting to beat a little faster. This snake is nasty and squirmy and scary as all get out (at least to me!).
| As you can tell, I was shaking by now. My pictures are a bit blurry at this point. |
The rat snake was staying far away from me so I was handling this as well as possible. Apparently, I can be in a room with a snake. I'm feeling very proud of myself.
Then it all started to go wrong. I hear good ole' Steve talking about how the snake loves everyone except Cubs fans. I'm good with that. Good call, rat snake! Then my brain starts to fog as I look to my right. I see blue, I see red, I see a "C". Oh crap! The only Cubs fan in a Cubs shirt is sitting right next to me. I look up at Steve. He's heading her (and my!) way. The panic sets in, I start sweating and I quickly look for an exit strategy. Next thing I know, I have scooped Logan up and moved to the far edge of his seat to leave one (and a half) chair spaces between me and the Cubs fan. Logan is enthralled with the snake, Jeff is laughing, I am holding back tears! Steve puts the snake in the girl's hands. I'm not even joking when I say that snake was less than 2 feet away! It was horrible. Then Steve hits the lady behind me in the face with the snake. I'm a little ashamed to admit this, but I am pretty sure I was using Logan as a human shield at this point! I mean, come on, surely the crazy man won't let the snake get near a toddler's hands. I must have been right because he moved on. Thank God!
| Darn Cubs Fan! I should have known better than to sit next to her! |
| A baby alligator |
| Albino Python |
| The python was 11 feet long! |
For any of you reptile fans, feel free to learn more about Serengeti Steve here. He even does birthday parties if you are into that thing.
Logan will never have Serengeti Steve over to our house...NEVER!
I did learn one valuable thing that evening. I will never ever EVER sit by a Cubs fan again!




